During my college years, I was lucky enough to have a house mother in my sorority who became my mentor and guided me through my younger years with her wisdom and unconditional love. My own mother was 3,000 miles away, so I relied on my replacement mother to help me navigate the minefields of my life.
One piece of advice she gave me when I was at a crossroads are words that echo in my head when I am feeling overwhelmed with my life. They are words I use that help me be a better woman, a better mother and a better wife. She explained to me there are three things in my life that I will want: a husband, a career and children. In a generation of women raised to believe we can have it all, my "mother" looked at me and said:
You can have all three of those things, but you will only ever be able to do two of those things well. You will either be a wonderful wife and mother, but your career will suffer. Or else you will have a successful career and children but then your marriage may suffer. You will always need to choose which of the three things in your life are your priorites and never feel guilty when you can only be really great at two of the things in your life.
To a young mother struggling to be everything all the time, having those words in my head comforted me and helped me choose my paths in life.
So, thank you to all the mothers out there who have ever shared their wisdom and advice that helped make our lives more understandable and less scary.
Pieces of motherly wisdom shared by Hartland moms:
- Renee Kelly: "Floors have to be cleaned on your hands and knees -- a mop isn't good enough."
- Heather Miškerik: "Mistakes are going to happen -- just be sure you learn from them!"
- Robyn Woolf: "Find a nerd/ geek in high school and marry him. He will be rich and handsome later."
- Angelina Kretz: "Life's not fair!"
- Jody Wehner: "A place for everything, and everything in it's place!"
- Elisa Bidus: "I always tell my kids that if you do something wrong, it is better to tell me and get in trouble than to not tell me and really get in trouble."
- Maggie DeLauder: "My mom told me once that when you see a penny it means someone in heaven is thinking of you. It seems that every time I have a bad day or a hard decision to make, there is a penny and I know she is thinking of me."
- Jennifer Ancheta: "My mom always says that after a difficult day with your children, go in and watch them sleep for a little while. The peaceful looks on their faces will help you remember the good things about motherhood."
- Laura Tinetti DeRosier: "Things happen for a reason. You may not know why, you may never know why, but God knows."
- Pam Wickman: "Say 'yes' whenever your can, and 'no' when you have to."
- Amy Harbison Lemke: "You will always get older but you can never go back, so don't rush anything and savor this time of your life."
- Debbie Causey Kangas: "My mom always told me to 'love what you do' and 'be true to yourself.' I hope to instill those same things in my own daughter.
- Jeannine Gogoleski: "Always tell the truth ... it will come out no matter what!"
- Susan Scharf: "From my mom -- 'No matter what the job is, go into the interview looking professional.' To my kids -- Always use your manners, you will get further in life with them than without."
- Amy Roach: "The most valuable advice that my mom ever gave me about raising children was that no matter what, always make sure that your child has a soft place to fall with you. Growing up can be so tough and they must have a place to feel they can let their guard down. My best advice that I DRILL into my kids heads is that you must strive to have great integrity. It's built, one day at a time. You are responsible for your own integrity."
- Cyndi Jamison Kenrick: "From my mom -- 'clean up as you go along.' To my kids -- attitude is everything!"